Aung San Suu Kyi Not Perfect - Exclusive

Burma Tha Din Network can exclusively reveal today the shocking new fact that Aung San Suu Kyi is not perfect.

The revelations will cause shock among her many supporters at home and abroad, including many world leaders.

Burma Tha Din began its investigation following the strident criticism in the online knitting community of two jumpers alleged to have been knitted by Daw Suu, which were recently auctioned.

We dared to think the unthinkable; if The Lady isn't good at knitting, is it possible she isn't perfect? If so, what else isn't she good at? We dispatched a correspondent to Oxford, where Aung San Suu Kyi used to live, and were amazed by what we found.

Based on conversations with neighbours, friends and people randomly walking down the road, we established the following revelations. Aung San Suu Kyi regularly let the tea stew too long in the pot, according to one neighbour.

Aung San Suu Kyi made lumpy porridge, and her children preferred aunty Lucinda's porridge.

Aung San Suu Kyi once ran out of sugar, and had to borrow some from a neighbour.

Once we came to terms with these revelations, we had to ask ourselves the obvious question, if Aung San Suu Kyi is not perfect, could she also be responsible for multiple human rights violations in Burma, such as forced labour, jailing political prisoners, torturing people, rounding up ethnic minorities in camps, and mortar bombing ethnic minority children?

We tried to reach President Thein Sein for comment, but a spokesman for his office said he was unavailable for comment because he was very busy committing multiple human rights violations, such as forced labour, jailing political prisoners, torturing people, rounding up ethnic minorities in camps, and mortar bombing ethnic minority children.

The revelations will undoubtedly provoke strong criticism of Aung San Suu Kyi, even among her supporters. Roger Benedict, spokesperson for Buddhist Solidarity Worldwide, told Burma Tha Din, "The revelations will shock her supporters who saw her as Asia's Jamie Oliver". Representatives from the Kachin, the Rohingya and the arms trade industry were not able to comment before our publication deadline.